Tuesday, September 13, 2011

TIPsy turvy~

what was the biggest tip you ever tipped?
n what was the occaision?
passing MBBS? passin Post Graduation? proposing your GF? gettin a dream job?
n how stupid did it really make you feel later?
'm not your regular spendthrift, nor am i a very generous guy. and i've practically set a personal record for tipping!
howzzat? u'd say.. :D
and how in hell did I LET THAT HAPPEN?
last friday, i was scrubbed in a particularly difficult Total hip replacement, some guy wit coxa vara, AVN and a femoral nail implanted 40 years ago.. removal of that implant was attempted thrice outside,without success.. and without the nail coming out, THR was almost impossible.
it could have fell on the head of any of the other registrars, but as luck would have it, the axe fell on my neck. and frankly, not just the surgeons (my boss and his team of "talented" registrars), but even the patient knew that the case could go wrong in a hundred different ways.
BUT, suprisingly, the case went on ridiculously well, and we had all the bases covered. probably thats why,the case took under 90 minutes.. and this was fast even for a routine THR.. nevermind a complicated one. so when, at nightfall, the boss asked us to join him for dinner at a local bar, we werent really surprised.
this local bar, called "black bush -the blackout bar" is really the terrace of a hotel with darkness as its theme. the chair, the tables, even the cutlery n the livery is black. you even have to read the menu with a torch. the only lights are at the bar counter and the walls, and even those are subdued. the service, the ambience and the food is pretty much okay, so its the place we guys always go to.
before leaving hostel.. i picked up two 500 rupee notes, green gandhis as i call em.. to join the usual red gandhi who likes to live in my wallet.
now dining with your boss is a double edged sword. you never know what lands you in trouble. and frankly, i am pretty much like a tail-ender who is forced to bat at no.3..in such informally formal parties... so when after too many rehearsed jokes and diplomatically placed innuendos the bill finally arrived, i practically jumped at it.. to express my 'immense gratitude' for being given the 'privilege' of this dinner.
and as is the custom, the boss kept insisting he'll pay. and thats not unusual.
but then, suddenly he popped out a 1000 rupee note n laid it bare on the table. "no negotiations" he said. and THAT is, ofcourse, unusual.
after much histrionic haggling, we were allowed to pay the rest. like a james bond gambling in casino royale, i snuck in a peek at the bill, a ugly 1580 plus, slid a 500 n a 100 rupee note, n sent the bill-guy away.. smiling deep inside.. cuz i knew that my two friends'd contribute.. so it was gonna be jus 200 per se.. yay, yay, yay!
no point in waiting for change, i said.. n we pushed off, all happy n contended.
the only good part about long day and large meals is .. you hit the bed, and then you realise that the funny sound ringin in your head is really your wake up alarm goin off..
and so, i woke up, n headed back to work.. stopping for tea. and then.. when i was trying to hunt for change in my overloaded wallet..
(dont get me wrong, my wallet is basically a closet for all papers that can be somehow be persuaded to fit in)..
i saw TWO green gandhijis smiling at me. i was about to wave back to em happily..
when i realised..
the only red bald man i can openly declare i love is obviously absconding.
i'd given away 2100 for the bill and not collected the goddamned change!
and thats how..
a regular dombivilikar who feels at home in overloaded locals, buys brands but only at end of season sales, and thinks mc donalds burgers are glorified vadapavs, who wears levis 501 on disposable fashion street t shirts..
gave a waiter a tip he wont even give to himself:P

Thursday, April 14, 2011

apples n oranges

april 14th
humor me. lets play god.
why discriminate between donkeys n horses? why not make stables for donkeys, and why cant horses be the beasts of burden.
its about time anyway. for centuries, horses have been groomed and pampered. and poor donkeys have been made to bear the brunt of labour.this has to be changed.
starting tommorow, donkeys shall not be discriminated against. donkeys shall be discriminated FOR. every stable should have spots reserved for donkeys. every race course shall have to accomadate donkeys. and donkeys must be made to run races with the horses. after all, dont donkeys deserve good nutrition.. given the right grooming, a donkey can be just as strong, just as graceful, just as fast, just as efficient.
horses have had ages of pampering. so its not injustice to deprive a few horses a race, the benefit of fair competition.
donkeys outnumber horses. pamper donkeys. this way, more souls get to be happy.. what the hell if that soul embodies a donkey. its all for the common good.
in short, lets make horses out of donkeys. come on, its possible.
and moreover, the right way to abolish being discriminated against.. is to discriminate for.
sounds lame?
really?

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

womans day.. BULLSHIT!

sometime last week the world observed a womans day. a day for silently introspecting how you treat the women around you. a day to promote feminism, to encourage women to fight for their rights. or so it seems, from a plethora of well worded facebook updates.
furthermore, to quote sandberg, women are not making it to the top of any professions anywhere in the world. only 13% of parlimentarians in the world are women, only 16-19% women hold jobs at the top level in corporates.. even in the non profit world, only 20% top dogs are women.
this seriously annoys me. and not because i am a chauvanistic pig. not because i am a believer of empowering women. and still it annoys me a lot.
i dont believe in empowering women. i believe in treating them for what they are. i have been in serious trouble sometimes, for making women cry. i 've been impulsively blunt and rude. and i have been told i dont know how to talk to a woman.
is this what you want? to plead your case, lobbying for special treatment in lieu of your biological shortcomings? give me a break.
the world i live in, women make fabulous and successful engineers, architects, dentists, doctors,dancers, artists, writers, scientists.. any goddamned field worth dreaming of, theres a lot of womens names that instantly come to mind.
around 50% population in the world is women. simply put, theres just as many women as men. and misery, poverty, disease, crime targets the weak. men suffer in ways that are different than women. doesnt mean men dont suffer.
if nature has given women certain biological shortcomings, like childbearing and probably less muscle power, nature has equipped them with beauty, emotional intelligence, and whatnot.
i have been competing with women in every walk of life.
and i believe, that is true equality. to be feared, competed with, harassed, beaten up, and yet expected to be doing your job.. regardless of your gender.
true equality is when you stop giving a damn about being a woman first.
and if you think you are a feminist, you are in the wrong. true feminism should rather be not giving a damn about being a woman. n not expecting to be treated differently because you are one.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

introspection

introspection is an intoxicating and ever-damning tool.
it challenges the very motive of what you do.
and how you felt about it.
it builds and it destroys.
it improves and modifies.
and above all, it is faith.
faith in adapting, improving, punishing and learning.
introspection is but your faith in your own greatness.