Tuesday, June 22, 2010

grrrrrr @ blogspot

911- blog missing!
i remember a few blogs that i had posted round here. but i am not able to find em.
for instance there was a blog about socrates on love and marriage. poof!
since i love th story a bit, 'm gonna go at it again.
i heard this story on a lazy tired evening, by a campfire after a day long hike.

one fine morning, Socrates picked up a weird topic to speak on. he grumbled about how the forest they live by has excellent timber, all lying ignored in the depths of the forest. n then he sent all of his pupils on a exploration spree. he asked em to find the best tree in the forest.
his pupils ventured far and long. meticulously analyzing trees they could find. n every time they found a good tree, they critically evaluated its wood, n sunk into doubt. whether this tree really was the best? was it really the tree they were lookin for. n they moved on, till dawn became dusk. needless to say, each and everyone of th pupils returned embarrassed and empty handed.. with nothing to show for.

the next morning, Socrates told the guys.." theres no wood left to make fire, quick.. get me firewood to make our morning tea." within no time, a huge pile of timber lay in front of Socrates eyes.

n then Socrates said softly.. friends, this is the difference between love and marriage. when you long for love, you await whats perfect. and perfection is a myth.
but when you are looking for marriage, you tend to get more realistic, compromising, and ultimately accept what suits your needs.

Monday, June 21, 2010

wc fever

damn i see brazil play this cup n i miss carlos. more importantly, th intuitive telepathy that was th hallmark of brazils game last time is evidently lacking. this time th gameplay is rougher, n th mindblowing set-ups and executions are somewhat missing. however, that same quality is now a feature of spains game.
i also wonder about th whole jabulani controversy. considering all the shots being misfired, its likely that this soccer ball has remarkably different dynamics, specifically a different flight, swing and kick-contact behaviour. i only hope players get used to this ball fast, n the game becomes more football n less physics.
some people say this world cup is less about stars n more about teams. i believe football is just as much about midfield play as it is about acrobatics and tricks of the strikers. so its just as much of the coach's homework and set-ups as about the unpredictable live game we see on tv.
lastly i regret the time i spend on watchin football. with exams barely 6 days away, i hope i can cut down on it for a week.

but then, damnit, wimbledon ka pehla round bhi chalu ho gaya, n th first match of first seeded federer vs the largely unknown n unseeded falla was classical federer. federer lost th first two sets.. 3rd set was at 4 games all when his element begins to kick in. 3rd set goes to federer after much friction with falla, fourth set goes to federer in a tie break, and the federer, as usual, steps on the gas, n demolishes the lesser known falla a merciless 6-0.. rawrrr!maza aa gaya!

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

the silly math of life

well plannin for exams n cuttin down on the hours i sleep made me realise the weird math of life.
we spend almost one third of our lives in immature childhood or demented dependant senility.
of the remaining two third, we spend almost half sleeping. the richest man in europe n the most ignorant aborgine in middle of the desert are at par with one other in comforts for this beautiful half of life
so for barely two sixth of our lifes, thats like just 30% of the net time does it really matter whether you are rich, whether you are successful, whether you are handsome/beautiful, whether you are famous/unknown, whether you are moral/criminal, wheter you are loved or lonely, wheter you conquer or relinquish, whether you cheat or be cheated..
the silly math of life. everything we do, everything we percieve, everything we feel. and everything we can ever be. it all boils down to thirty percent.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

i think i know

about the men i know,
theres one thing i know,
that when they say yes they mean yes,
n no when they say no.

but with the women i know,
now for sure i know,
that a man may never really know,
when a no means yes,
or when a yes means no!
-mananonymous
father of anonymous,
married to unanimous,
and sometimes feel magnanimous.
(sorry for the family tree, but easiest way to be famous is to be associated with someone famous, and till a very late stage in my school days, i believed anonymous was a famous latin poet.)

Saturday, April 10, 2010

reflections

is the only way to be truly happy- to do the right thing?

intellect is rewarding, but not when its chip on your shoulder, more so when its a pocket watch, so that when asked, you can promptly em show the time.

more comin as they flip up my mind

june 10
lifes a stage, characters come and go, friendships happen, wilt away, love happens, heartbreaks occur. parents become friends, and then dependents. spouses enter. kids ensue. but if there is one constant in your life.. its siblings. you grow with them, they see the kid become a boy, and the boy become a man. even as you evolve and become a complex contorted adult.. they know the choices you made, and the prejudices that developed. the successes and failures in life and relationships that make you the middle aged adult. in this ever evolving revoluting scene of life, if there is one constant companion, one denominator, its your brothers n sisters. although friends last long and become almost as close as a sibling, there never can be a parallel to the person who saw you go through your first day at school, or saw you get over your first heartbreak. and then i wonder.. how immature are those who let squabbles and property come between this.

june 18th
among various things that go into making you an adult... i think theres one thing about tragedies n bein able to cope up with em. you are more of an adult when you dont let tragedies stop you or loose focus. apparently the more tragedies you see, n i dont mean just personal.. the more you develop an insight in human behaviour, and the fragility of circumstance and soul. i almost wonder that, the more hurt you endure, the older you become.

june 23rd
the only thing more painful than learning from experience is not learning from experience.. archibald something

june 28th
people tend to form friends and admire people usually depending on one defining quality. ofcourse every person has multiple qualities. but its usually one important attribute that clinches the deal.
i realised this when i observed that i have the weirdest variety of close friends.. from the absolut geeks, nerds.. to th meanest bullies, from tee-totallers n idealists to guys who think drinking means gettin sloshed and all rules are only made so that you can break them.so basically i tried to find out what was "the one thing" common to all of em.
initially i thought i was a hypocrite, a chameleon with no standards of my own. i thought highly of people who chose their company in accordance to certain defined norms.
ultimately i realised that all i look for is loyalty and honesty. if i see that in a person, i think i am cool with him.
if you are reading this, i am happy. and i would also like you to think, and tell me.. whats the gold you dig for in a person? which is the one thing that makes you call someone a friend?

july 17th YE Pyar kiss chidiya ka naam hai?
i am very much a analytical man. so analytical that what i do in my mind is analyse my own emotions even as they rise. this makes me a sort of less emotional man. but it doesnt make me any less prone to commiting emotional stupidities. wierd but true. sometimes i even curse myself for never really fallin in love, like some rare friends i ve seen.. people who were so much in want of one another that they made tough choices. choices made by the heart, not the brain. most of the time, i make choices with my reasons, and not against them.
and now here i am, in a lucky vacation in time.. where i am allowed to live my life. and to sit and ramble. i realise why some people are incapable of falling in love.
they are constantly analysing their position. they arent spending much time in feeling anything. they are just spending time as regards how far they have gone, what kinda image have they created so far, how well have they understood the enemy (counterpart rather), what kindda control can they now exert,how to improve their control.. is this the deal they want, if this is the deal they want how can they seal it.. if this isnt the deal they want how can they get out of it without much drama or harm.
what makes them act this way? sometimes i just blame this on the mumbaikar attitude.. get everything done fast, dont rely on anyone, dont be ashamed of being yourself, enjoy life(always have a smile on your face). but then why dont all mumbaikars suffer from "unable-to-fall-in-love" syndrome.
at one end is human specimens that have conclusively proven that love is just an emotion coated form of lust justified by the projected aim of happiness and begetting a family..n lots of times the projected aim shifts focus to another target.. sometimes after rehearsals..
while at the other end of the spectrum are hot blooded heroes who have made great sacrifices, fought personal battles n made absolut polar ends meet.. AND still managed to come up victorious in the name of love.
and then th last piece of wood to this fire of argument.. which is the real world? the one that is in our mind.. with perceptions, emotions and feelings and beliefs about every single thing we sense? a brick is a brick in YOUR mind, in your perception.
or the real world composed of matter and energy. with no inherent emotional value. a vast machine with independent chunks of biological machines of plasma.. that function on easily identifiable norms and motives.


july 22
i realised a couple of days ago that when i blog, i just state the obvious. its nothing out of the box really. obviously i began to wonder, why the hell do i blog then? thats when i realised i blog for myself. i like the thoughts that come to my mind. and considering the sheer volume of new thoughts and ideas that forever keep coming, this is one way i keep to preserve them. this is how i keep myself from forgettin em.

sep 5
is it just me or do all the people who've been smart asses in school dont particularly cherish teachers day?
i am grateful for what i have been taught. but THAT is grossly restricted to few who truly made a difference. to me, ever since i was a kid, reading out loud from a textbook didnt equate with teaching.. which is why most professional teachers dont like me.. needless to say, thats very mutual.
and then theres people who showed me something i couldnt see.. like helped me understand a concept or demonstrate a technique.. or simply realise what a statement truly means.. understand what lies between the lines..thinkin of those few people, makes me smile, regardless of where i am.
and i suppose there is also an element of dignity. a dignity awarded by a teacher to s student, in lieu of his will to learn. the teachers i liked most have been associated with that, a desire to teach, to impart knowledge, to reward an amateur curiosity with the insight of their experience. after all thats all there is to life, isnt it? to learn to talk, to stand, to spell, to understand, and even to enjoy.
so heres cherishing the phenomenon of teaching.. very much all that living is all about. cheers!

jan1
what is worse?
givin someone up cuz you think you might not be good enough.. only to realise later that you were?
or rejection.. being told to your face you are not good enough, even if only subtly?
they say sometimes.. doing somethin is worse than doin nothing.
but then,how would we really know.. how to choose?

march 19
as kids, we are polished new pennies. minds who believe in conscience. people who want to do all the good they can do. naive.
and then we live. we learn that being good to everyone is not possible. and that we might put our 'self' on the back burner, but eventually, people take you for granted. people take unfair advantage of you. people demand sacrifices. people become ungrateful. you love people, and they take bites of you, they undermine your self worth. and worst is when they use you to beget something.
is it a battle of minds then? is it about intellect? in third person we despise and mock someone who gets used. and we cringe when we are played into the part of a fool. and from this arise bitterness, and bile of hate so vile, it burns up your throat in frustration. the penny that was once shiny and clean, gets tarnished, hammered and passed on.and you just loose your shine in these transactions of life.

march 26
now this is gonna sound weird and misanthropic n what not.
whatever new pleasures there are to experience,
whatever adventures there are to try..
whatever skills there are to acquire,
whatever new there is to do,
you exhaust all that by 42
and after that, day in and day out,
lifes predictable.. no questions no doubt
people say having kids changes everything,
it keeps you interested in living.
i am not too sure on that. seriously,
apart from 20-25% people whose lives can be described as exciting,
is there anything but responsibilities that keeps 40 year old living?
and if it does,whats the whole point!?!

may 17
a good teacher is one who can learn from his students.

JAN2
sometimes a person abuses himself because he is tired of the abuse he has been taking from the hands of others.
sometimes a person doesnt react, he absorbs and redirects. even without understanding it himself.
and then the person wonders why others dont see him the way he sees himself. why he lacks the control mechanisms to avoid self destructive actions.
and in sum total of this all, you get, what they call, a regular adult person.

july 5, 12 we should realise that some people deserve love and respect. we should never let anger and frustration allow us to take this relation for granted. similarly, we should remember that showering respect on undeserving people ends up in causing hurt to ourself. so, its better to be curt and show them their place, rather than trusting them reactionary to a momment of goodness.

aug 15
ahalf the things being sold today make their buck targetting insecure people. selling them dreams of a virtuality. but the fact is the sooner you are comfortable living in your own skin, the happier you are gonna be

sept 14
do not try to evaluate or judge an act done for you out of emotion.
and do not EVER describe or ascribe material value to things you do for family. the minute a gift is described by its worth, it looses its value entirely. and this.. extends to actions and sacrifices as well.

Saturday, April 3, 2010

the rule of overkill.

i work in a very busy orthopedic hospital, and we have a diverse set of people as patients.. from farmers to politicians, shopkeepers to enterpreneurs.. from the ordinary people to some less ordinary.
most are admitted for fracture surgery, deformity correction, or joint replacement.
there is always a little built-up, sort of an awe, about the vips, be it a simple colles fracture, or a complex acetabular fracture. we use the same team, the same implants, in the same OT, for the richer n the not-so-rich guys.
basically, most factors that might really alter the course of a disease do not differ. those factors are truly randomised.
inspite of that, most 'nobodys' have fabulous results. the post op xrays n follow up xrays are mindblowing.
and then theres the curse. most 'unforced errors', like an acceptable but imperfect result, tend to occur in th vips.
inspite of special rooms, imported waterproof drapes, meticulous planning, absolute commitement... somehow, the richest patients have results that arent so rich. while poorer guys, in whom the team is not worried about, fare perfectly well.
being a part of the team for some time and being out of it for now, even when i look at guys coming for follow ups, its always the less glamorous guys who come walking normally.
well 90% people have good results. so th point i am trying to make is, why do we screw up in the more important cases, although the screw up is only marginal, it is certainly there.


i then extrapolated this to cricket, sala IPL fever. but so many stars play better when they are playin a difficult team but not a important match. an important match with a lallu team may lead to unexpected failure.

and then to other areas of life.. including relationships, competitions and projects. jus like nahs's game theory, my idea of overkill has a definite hold.

Sunday, January 31, 2010

ran!! rgv in his element:)

theres few things about ran that i acn safely say without bein a plot spoiler..
first is welcome back RGV. typical political movie with intense scree play, unconventional camera angles and convincin characters.. so much that you wonder who deserves the credit, the director or the casting team! but knowing that this director can make even morons can act.. methinks its the director. too many times you wonder if this is ambani and this is modi etc. but its rgv style anyhow, that his films are so close to whats happenin in real life.. and his characters always resemble someone.
movie is loosley based on modern day journalism n politics, the story movies at an even pace.. neither too fast nor too slow. but what i really got here to say is
1. the irony of casting is purab, the guy who plays the role of the crusader in reality is the son of th ex CM! hehe verma, hope people get the joke. i mean ritesh deshmukh sure has done full justice to the role, but the irony of casting him cant escape you.
2. i wish the last scene was a voice on the phone..
elder brother of saldhaniya, the industrialist speakin " congrats mate, your finally what you wanted to be. i have transferred the money in your swiss bank account. enjoy". n ritesh deshmukh, on the other side, smiles n keeps the phone down.